


Fancy, Fancy Not

by Elphen



Category: Lewis (TV)
Genre: Dialogue-Only, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-21
Updated: 2012-12-21
Packaged: 2017-11-21 22:35:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/602832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elphen/pseuds/Elphen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Did he ever fancy you?"</p>
<p>Well, Lewis, it is a legitimate question to ask, isn't it?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fancy, Fancy Not

**Author's Note:**

> Came to me as a result of a 'conversation' with asparagusmama. I have only done one dialogue-only fic and that was years ago, so this was interesting to do.
> 
> MANY, many thanks and hugs once more to the absolutely wonderful TheMuchTooMerryMaiden for being the beta and britpicker for this one. She did a lovely job and all remaining errors are mine.
> 
> This year also marks a decade since John Thaw passed away - thank you for all you brought, Thaw.

“Did he ever fancy you?”

“What was that?”

“I said, did he ever fancy you?”

“Who on earth are you talking about, man?”

“Morse.”

“What? How in the bloody hells of Purgatory did you come up with that? I know your mind works in mysterious ways, but…”

“I believe you mean the hells of Inferno; Purgatory is-“

“Yes, yes, I _know_. But the question remains, sergeant – how and why?”

“It’s a legitimate question.”

“No, it’s not! You don’t know what you’re asking. The likelihood of Morse being…being gay is about as big as you coming out a…a transvestite!”

“I might surprise you yet, sir. Careful, you’ll spill your beer with all the gesticulation. Also, what I actually asked wasn’t his sexuality, but whether he fancied you.”

“No. No! Morse was a ladies’ man, through and through. Got his heart broken so many times by them, idealistic, romantic old sod that he was.”

“Did you fancy him, then?”

“What is this, some kind of bloody wind-up? If it is, Hathaway, you’re treading dangerous ground here, man.”

“Spirit of inquiry, sir, I only just wondered. All things considered.”

“All things considered, you’re leaning dangerously close to a slap, sergeant. But since I know you, I’d best answer now before we alert the whole pub.”

“Always knew you were clever, sir. You should be a detective.”

“You’re not in the clear for getting a slap yet, lad. I was a happily married man, so no, I didn’t – and even if I wasn’t married, well…it was not that kind of relationship. At all. I was his sergeant and he was my inspector and…well, I suppose he was fond of me as I was of him. In an apprentice/teacher and mutual friends way, mind. Always trying to teach me, Morse, make me understand the things he loved.”

“…”

“Now what?”

“Oh, no, nothing, sir. Nothing at all.”

“Hathaway, whenever you say ‘nothing’ like that, I always feel like I’m back with me children having done nowt but trouble and hoping not to get caught.”

“You had this soft expression on your face, sir. Fond, I’d say.”

“Not going there, sergeant. Platonic relationship, him and me. But there was something, something in his eyes when he smiled or laughed; they’d light up and become this brilliant blue.”

“Mhm.”

“Don’t you- oh, very clever, Hathaway. But no, I refuse to rise to it. There is nothing wrong with acknowledging good points about a person, is there?”

“None at all. Shall I get the next round in?”

“Not so fast, lad, sit back down. You’ve clearly got a point to make, so come on. Let’s hear it.”

“It’s none of my business.”

“Yet you asked.”

“…Yes.”

“Why, James? Why is it important to you?”

“…”

“Don’t tell me you’re…what, you’re jealous?”

“…”

“Jealous of something that…Oh…For pity’s sake, man, have a little taste. I’m not exactly the prize bull at the market, am I? I’m almost twice your age n all.”

“And my superior officer and a man and not gay in the slightest. I know all that, sir.”

“And yet you still…what, fancy me?”

“…”

“Hathaway. James – stop, look at me. Just look at me, please? I know you. You’d rather cut your tongue out and pretend you’ve never had one than to ask a question like that, knowing where it could lead, without some serious reason to do so. Why now?”

“Because…because it seems everybody but me gets to have you and I…I just don’t want to lose you…”

“I see.”

“…Why aren’t you shouting, sir? Why aren’t you telling me how utterly and completely disgusting I am? Why are you still sitting there, so calmly?”

“Well, I don’t know. It might be because I don’t think that you are and that I want to stay here, with you?”

“But why? Nothing good ever comes out of it when I like something. It always turns to ashes.”

“Bit melodramatic, aren’t we? I think Morse felt like that, too, though, on his darker days. How nothing would ever turn out right. But I guess that’s the good thing about being just a plain old Northerner – I could tell him then and I can tell you now to pull your head out of highly educated arse.”

“You honestly said that?”

“Perhaps not in so many words, but yeah, more or less. He’d look furious then before he’d break into those grins. I wish you could have seen those.”

“So you did-“

“Will you come off it, man? I loved Morse, yeah, but in an entirely platonic way. Which this definitely _isn’t_ going to be.”

…

“You kissed me.”

“Yup.”

“You kissed me. In public. Sir, if this some kind of pity, I really don’t need it.”

“You’re not that daft, man. Work it out.”

“So…you wanted to do it?”

“Give the lad a medal. Now, are you going to continue sitting there with your mouth hanging open or are we going somewhere more private to snog?”

“Your place or mine, sir?”

“Arh, you’re catching on fast now, bonny lad. Yours, I think. It’s closer.”

“As always, you are absolutely right. Shall we?”

**Author's Note:**

> The kind of grin/laugh of Morse's I always remember and thought of when writing this is...well, look at ep10 of Morse - "Deceived By Flight", about half an hour in.
> 
> I had way too much fun with this and it almost wrote itself. But please, of course, do tell me if their 'voices' are off or there's anything amiss. Comments in general are loved and treasured.


End file.
